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  1. Yesterday
  2. Nice....enjoy it while it last. You know what the best winter activity is? That's right......fucking
  3. She is getting filled too so there is no difference between the two...
  4. Dear Jeremy Kyle, I am 16 years old and pregnant with my boyfriend, who is 20 years older than me. He is married with 3 kids, he's also a drug dealer, carries a gun and is just out of prison..... How do I tell my parents he's from Liverpool??
  5. Snap
  6. Last week
  7. About time you earned your keep.
  8. And I refer you back to my previous point that we don't have a world class group of players to pick from like England do.
  9. No, you just do that during qualifying.
  10. My rest days start on Tuesday. Got amber warning for 3 days!
  11. Are you? I have my feet up in front of the nice warm fire. No work until Tuesday.
  12. Rushed off our feet with heavy snow, A66 is shut with multiple RTC at Warcop!
  13. The backlash against Coronation Street's male rape storyline has led ITV bosses to consider whether it ought to drop the soap....
  14. Zodiac signs can tell a lot about your personality.... For instance, if you believe in them, you're an utter cunt.
  15. Pervert. A sandwich here is a food i.e. Two slices of bread with a filling in between.
  16. I misinterpret the joke. A sandwich here is a threesome when she is between two men
  17. The missus has gone on a spa weekend to help her feel younger and look more beautiful.... I love a fucking optimist!
  18. As my sperm dripped down my wife's chin, I looked in her eyes and asked "Do you like that? " "No", she relied. "What the fuck is in this sandwich?"
  19. Quorn is basically a dildo..... A meat substitute for pussies.
  20. It looks like Simon Mignolet's plans to dress up as a ghost for the Liverpool easter fancy dress party have gone wrong........ turns out the wanker hasn't got enough clean sheets!
  21. At least we can't embarrass ourselves by getting beaten by some shit county and then going home after the group stages.
  22. Got to be in it to win it - oh that's right, you're not!
  23. If Gareth Southgate insists on picking all these Liverpool players, don't be surprised if England get to the final and still finish 3rd.
  24. The door bell went earlier..... I hate living in Liverpool.
  25. List Four advantages of breast milk: No need to boil Cannot be stolen Available when needed Stored in attractive containers!
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